Sea to Summit

I was fortunate to have the entire week off before Sea to Summit (S2S) and I am damn glad I did.  It had been since very early 2020 and since I'd had more than three days off in a row.  I was feeling burnt out and exhausted. AND this race takes a lot more prep work than other triathlons. I was diligent all week with my to-do lists, recovery and "primer" workouts and getting enough rest and eating well. NAPS and SNACKS. By the time Friday came I mostly had to pack up the truck. Unfortunately because I am a worrier I was anxious about logistics all week and did not sleep well most of the week.  I did manage to get a pretty good night sleep Wednesday and Thursday.  

Going into Friday and after my primer/opener run and bike workouts I was feeling pretty ready for race day. AND I got a text from my good friend Carole just before I set out on my ride that she was going to join me for part of the hike!  Mare had been planning to, but was injured and it was question mark.  I certainly could do the hike solo, but man the idea of having one or two friends hiking with me was amazing. And I knew it would push me to stay on pace. It takes a village for most of us to get to the start line and then finish line of a race, but this race it is imperative and required to have help. I had not one, but two porters: Amy and Mare. And now I get a friend to join me for the first half of the hike.  WOO HOO . 

As Mare and I pulled into the race site Friday afternoon my blood pressure and heart rate rose. I was both excited and terrified.  This race was going to be a huge challenge and I wasn't positive that I could hit the cut off times. But I was going to do my best. And if I had to finish unofficially; I would. My mindset had changed. It felt like an honor to be there. And so many people had helped me get there through various levels of support. The fear was quickly over ridden by excitement.  The venue was lush and gorgeous. The weather was going to be cool.  However, there was already talk of high winds and cold temps at the top of Mt Washington.  This meant a question mark if we'd be able to summit the mountain. We went to the air bnb, ate dinner, discussed last minute logistics, finished organizing, and attempted to sleep.  

I got roughly 3.5 hours of interrupted sleep, but was feeling weirdly good.  I felt nauseous and had trouble eating my bar.  I managed to eat half. And placed the other half in my bike jersey. We found out in the dark early cold morning hours that due to 33 mph wind gusts and 30 degree weather at the top that we'd be climbing to Hermit Lodge and turning around. The finish line would be back at Wild Cat. I was disappointed but also pleased that the race officials were being smart and keeping our safety in mind. 

The swim:  We all piled into to the water at roughly 5:28 for a 5:30 start.  There was a delay to the start of the race, however they did not announce this so we were all standing around in cold water.  By the time the released us I was shivering.  I am not sure I actually warmed up until I was on the bike.  The course was gorgeous, but I had a hard time sighting.  Maybe I was out of practice. Maybe it was that there were not many big buoys.  I felt OK during the out portion of the course, but struggled coming back. I just felt off and could not find my rhythm. My swim time was significantly slower than any of my training swims and than I expected.  I ran out of the water and up to T1.  Amy was there waiting for me and encouraging me to run. I was shivering and my lips were blue.  I made a decision weeks ago that I'd change shirts with each discipline.  Changing socks and shirts gives me a huge mental boost.  And I am glad I made that decision. Changing out of a wet tri jersey and into a  bike jersey helped me warm up fast on the bike. Mare and Amy helped me get dressed, load the bike course, and hop on the bike.  

The bike: I ran over to the bike mount area and hop on Speedy. My legs felt good and course was showing, although my Garmin told me that it was having trouble loading turn-by-turn directions. It was imperative that the course load.  S2S is unique in that it does have a designated bike course. Most athletes use the same route and have for years. There were no arrows on the ground, no cops or volunteers at intersections. No cones anywhere protecting you from traffic and asshole drivers. And the field is small, 100 racers, so it was unlikely I'd be in a pack of athletes. I am not that fast. I felt great for the first 15 or so miles.  But I dropped my bar trying to look at my cue sheet.  I had not seen Amy or Mare and was panicking that I'd messed up and given them incorrect cue sheets.  I had no phone or cash and only two water bottles with Untapped electrolyte mix.  That would last me twenty or so miles but not 90. Around mile 20 my course with turn by turns loaded. phew.  And I started seeing a few racers.  And then I saw Amy and Mare. I smiled and got a big boost. All was well.  I fueled up, grabbed more water and off I went. I was diligent about getting electrolytes and Untapped waffles into me.  My stomach was audibly growling around mile 15, which was not a good sign.  The front end of the course was a lot hiller and harder than I expected. It was demoralizing. I tried attacking the hills but didn't have enough umph and was in a bad head space. Then something switched. Maybe it was because I knew I was over half way of the course. Maybe it was because there were finally some gentle rollers and flats. Maybe I finally had enough calories in me. But I felt great between mile 55-85 or so. By the time I saw Mare and Amy at mile 61 or so I was feeling good and ready to tackle Pinkham notch.  I cruised to Conway and up Westside Road.  There I saw Carole in her car, which gave me another boost. I felt fantastic in the stretch from Conway to Route 16.  There was significant head wind making it tough to get down in aero but I kept trying. I saw my parents at Story Land which gave me another boost. I love that they come to my races.  I stopped one more time at mile 82 or so for a bottle exchange and an Untapped Maple syrup and coffee shot. YUM. Carole gave me the heads up that the notch was three peaks with a rest in between each . OK I can do this. I toggled back in forth on my Garmin to see the elevation profile and the map. I kept my bike in a low gear and kept spinning; alternating from standing to sitting. Getting in my aero bars when could. The road just kept going up but I kept spinning.  I glanced at my watch and knew I only had a few minutes to get to T2 before the cut off. I shifted down and pushed harder. I reached the top. Finally. I saw the Mt Washington trail head.  I saw Carole waiting for me.  I saw the "Wild Cat next right sign". I saw Amy, my parents, and Willow.  Amy ran up to me and told me to hurry.  Mare ran over. The two of them were helping me get dressed and change shoes. I just made the cut off.  

The "run": I got clear to run and off I went.  I chugged some coke and ate half a banana. I ran-walked up to the Tuckerman's trail.  My legs were wobbly and stiff but I felt pretty good! My crew was there.  Up the mountain I went with Carole and Mare.  We ran-fast hiked up.  Mare turned around about a mile up. Carole and I kept going. I stumbled a lot.  Thank goodness for the trees that prevented me from falling! The trail is not super steep at this point in the climb but it is very rocky requiring agility and constant attention. Needless to say I was not super agile at this time and stumbled A LOT but no actual falls. We rounded a bend and could see the lodge.  I upped the pace and checked in! Time to turn around and finish this thing.  We ran much of the descent. At one point I got super nauseous and needed to sit down. I was very close to actually throwing up.  Carole talked me through breathing and I managed to get back up and start walking again. Then jogging and sorta running! Then we saw Amy! She had hiked up with my Mom then decided to keep going. The three of us ran down to the trail head. I was very proud of Amy for running.  Carole and I kept going and managed to run most of the way back.  We rounded the bend and there was the finish line! I'd made it! Amy, Mare, my parents and Willow were there waiting. Along with a few race officials. I was very pleased with how I felt on the hike. 

I got my medal and kissed the ground. It was not quite as awesome as kissing the top of Mt Washington, but still amazing. This race was unlike anything I've done. It was hard. It pushed my limits . It was fun.  I will do it again.  

I am so thankful to Amy, Mare, and Carole for getting me through this race. Amy and Mare were amazing.  The got be ready and out of transition very quickly.  There were ready at every planned stop with everything I needed and more.  Amy with her Chewbacca mask. The both boosted me up when I needed it. Carole helped me up to the lodge and back. I could not have done this race without them. Its a tough day for us racers, but the support crew work just as hard and get up just as early.  I am a lucky person to have them in my life. And to my parents who were there cheering, had my coke, and made an amazing dinner later. I could not have asked for a better crew.  

This was the first long distance triathlon I have done as a low carb high fat athlete.  I felt great during my training using Untapped. My stomach felt icky during parts of the hike.  I need to reexamine my nutrition.  I am considering UCAN and perhaps using Untapped for an extra boost.  I am wondering if my body just couldn't handle that many hours with simple sugar.   I felt off during the first half of this race.  After a day or so to reflect I think so of that was nerves.  Some of it was being unable to eat enough prior to the race. Some of it was being cold in the water.  I am proud of myself for continuing to move forward. And for crossing the finish line with a lot of help from my friends. I am so happy to be back to racing and training with my friends.  

I'd highly recommend this race.  It's well organized.  The staff and volunteers are kind, communicative, and organized. I'll do it again. Hopefully next time I'll get to summit the mountain! 

Finally an extra huge thank  you to Amy.  It's hard being a partner to a triathlete. We're gone for hours at a time, sometimes all day.  We go to bed early. And eat a lot. She is by my side and my biggest supporter.  I am not sure how I got so lucky. But here I am . 

 

Long run block, Tour of Sufflandria, and goals of 2021

I had big plans for 2020. I had a great 2019 season with the Boston Marathon, Pumpkinman 70.3, Spartan Beast at Killington, and various other smaller OCRs and races. I was feeling strong and ready to kick ass in Sea to Summit; a race I'd wanted to do for years. I set myself up for a great season with a big run block and then a big bike block. And then covid-19 roared through the world. And through my life. I tried to train, I tried to find that fire but I was going through the motions. I'd cry during workouts or do them but at very low intensities. Covid-19 was still alive and well in my facility and my stress level was through the roof. I knew that I couldn't give training and S2S my full self. I made a big decision to defer. I did some virtual races, did a lot of hiking and trail running, tried to build strength, and used training to relieve stress and be the best me I could be for my patients. But more on that later. I am entered into Sea to Summit this year. 2021. A new year. A new me. I did 100 days of running/hiking from Nov-January and ran/hiked 100 miles in January. Most of the miles were running, but I chose to count hiking as Ill be hiking (hopefully fast hiking) up Mt Washington in July. I ran through cold weather, snow, and the dark. Most runs were in the dark morning hours. I learned that my body can handle that much running. I've trained it for that after years of endurance racing. I started with most days being half mile and a couple of threes, with a longer run on the weekend. Then went upward; in January most runs were 2 miles or more. I gained speed and strength. I am still not as fast as I was last winter, but I am feeling more fluid and stronger. I hit some faster intervals and I feel that I'll get back there. I just completed my third Tour of Sufflandria. It looks like I did all but one stage back in 2019. Last year I did it full power, known as nuclear. This year I finished the ToS with altered metrics per my coach. In the past I've tweaked the schedule a bit to accommodate my work schedule. This year I made a promise to do the stages on the day that the Minions laid out. It meant getting up at 4 am every day last week and going into work a little later than normal some days. My body felt trashed some days. I wanted to go to bed at like 8 every night, but I did it. And I actually felt stronger on days 6 and 7 then I did earlier in the week. And I am doing it all at slightly higher power numbers. And on a smart trainer. On that note I bought a Kickr Core in November. Because I was mostly running Nov-Jan it's only been in Feb that I am feeling the full difference in training with a smart trainer. For years I used cadence/speed sensors to allow me to use Sufferfest and Zwift. Power numbers were estimated. Then I bought a power meter. I immediately saw a difference in training both inside and out. I hadn't been pushing myself quite hard enough. This year I have a smart trainer. There is no way to cheat. A few months in and almost a month in doing harder workouts with it and I am feeling a difference. I can hit the cadence targets most of the time at the prescribed power targets. I am super excited to see how this affects my racing and outdoor riding! I was adamantly opposed to power for a long time. I once read that Chrissie Wellington didn't use power. And if she didn't' need it then why did I. But times have changed, I am getting older, and everyone is using it now. I needed to grow with the times and technology if I was going to be able to compete. So here I am training with power and wishing I'd done it sooner. I have used running and triathlon to deal with my stresses and anxiety for my entire adult life. There have been times in my life where I am only happy when I am training or racing. It calms me, gives me more energy, and builds confidence. All thing that allow me to kickass in day to day life. I ran the 2018 Boston Marathon to heal from the tragic 2013 Boston Marathon bombings. When I crossed the line I wept and felt like I'd taken back the Marathon. It regained what it had meant to me for years. The covid-19 pandemic has changed me. Perhaps for the better, that remains to be seen. I have seen more death in the last 400 days than I have in my life time. I am fortunate, I suppose that I have lived this long before seeing so much death in my circle. But there I am, watching my patients and residents die. Caring for them one day and tomorrow they are gone. Watching my patients who were pretty independent on Friday suddenly need 100% assistance to get in and out of bed, to toilet. Watching them cry because they don't understand what is going on. Trying to comfort patients who are fearful and isolated, away from family and friends. Learning of a death and having to reset and treat/care for the next patient. Never really grieving, because we didn't have time to. Because opening up those wounds is too painful. Dealing with hate and criticism from the media and outside world when we were trying to build a plane while flying over an ocean in the middle of a tsunami. Sitting in my car and the end of the day to reset enough to drive home. Things are better. We know more. We are wiser and more careful. But I still haven't totally healed. I feel fire again when I am working out. I feel more like me. But I continue to have a cloud of sadness over me. Healthcare workers continue to be clad in full PPE for most of the day. It may seem easy. But it adds a component of discomfort to our day. the gowns we wear are essentially plastic, plus an N95 mask, plus goggles, plus gloves. I feel sweat pouring down my back and chest most of the day. Then you take the gown off and are freezing because you're clothes are wet. We spend 40 hours a week being super cautious at work for the sake of our patients, our family and friends, and for ourselves. We haven't seen friends and family in almost a year because we are protecting them. And we see people on the internets going about their lives as if we were not still in a pandemic. And we wonder why the fuck we are doing what we are doing. But we keep doing it. Because we love our patients. Because we believe that it's the right thing to do. Because we want to set an example. But it's fatiguing. I just want my life back like everyone else. I want to hug my parents, my sister, my niece, my friends. I want to casually walk into work and have a great day wearing nothing but my clothes. But this is not our reality. I had a moment a couple of weeks ago. I recalled how running the 2018 Boston Marathon helped me heal from that horrific tragedy. Although we are not out of the woods with covid-19 there is hope. To help me heal I am dedicating my training and racing to everyone I have personally seen die from covid-19 and to every healthcare worker I know and love. It will help motivate me to do my workouts when I want to sleep in or collapse on the couch after a long day. And I hope allow me to process everything that we all went through. And the end of the day as hard as this has all been; if I had it all to do again I wouldn't change a thing. "You're broken down and tired Of living life on a merry go round And you can't find the fighter But I see it in you so we gonna walk it out And move mountains We gonna walk it out And move mountains And I'll rise up I'll rise like the day I'll rise up I'll rise unafraid I'll rise up And I'll do it a thousand times again And I'll rise up High like the waves I'll rise up In spite of the ache I'll rise up And I'll do it a thousand times again" Andra Day Rise Up You're broken down and tired Of living life on a merry go round And you can't find the fighter But I see it in you so we gonna walk it out And move mountains We gonna walk it out And move mountains And I'll rise up I'll rise like the day I'll rise up I'll rise unafraid I'll rise up And I'll do it a thousand times again And I'll rise up High like the waves I'll rise up In spite of the ache I'll rise up And I'll do it a thousand times again